Opinion of Fanny Charpentier, energy therapist
Caring for and protecting our children would encourage narcissistic, individualistic people who are not very capable of stepping aside in the name of the collective interest; with a consequence of the danger to our democracies. Should we put “the rest” before our children? Should they be sacrificed on the altar of society?
Our democracies are built on the social contract, but by no means on the notion of sacrifice. The social contract – the foundation of our democracies – implies that I give up some of my freedoms in the name of collective protection, security to which I would not have access if I remained completely free, but isolated. This is a mutually beneficial exchange: the formation of society, because it is beneficial for everyone. The concept of sacrifice arises from the imbalance of this contract. Propaganda capable of leading generations to the fields of war or terrorism has made it its commodity: I lose too much (for example, life) in protecting the (hypothetically protecting) collective.
Implicitly, the idea of requiring children to imagine sacrifice invites us to think about what our society already means in terms of sacrifice in our children. Charlotte, 4 months, in the nursery from 6 am to 6 pm. Ethan, 6, at school, and his string of daycare and extracurricular activities from 7am to 6:30pm. Eight-year-old Mila, who is looked after by an army of nannies and nannies while her parents are on duty on the night shift. What sacrifices are they making? Who remembers what it means at 4 months, 6 or 8 years old not to see your parents more than twice an hour every day?
These are the children I receive in my office, immersed in doubt, insomnia, fear, anxiety, sadness, anger. They sometimes already have a “slightly old” body. Look at them, these children: little pieces walking up and down the massage table.
They are our children, cherished and protected, our supposedly royal children. Do you really think they endanger our democracy?
Haven’t they – we adults – built a world in which our children have become a problem to be managed, responsible? Of course, the first instinct that comes to us as adults is to say that we, too, are suffering. We also sacrifice ourselves. “I work for you day and night” … And actually, why? Paying for internships because we have to keep them while we work? Buying a car to take them to school because we don’t have time to walk a hundred meters with our nose downwind? Pay a psychiatrist, a kinesiologist, or even a dog (or raccoon) to take care of the problems caused by this loss of connection? Why do we agree to sacrifice ourselves? Why do we accept nervous, stressed-out parents who are completely unable to, in fact, live two short hours a day with our children, in full benevolent attention? What has become of our democracy, our society, doesn’t that endanger us?
Look at these children, your children.
What security do we still offer them?
What is the point of a social contract when parents run in all directions, exhausted, weakened by the economic crisis after the health crisis? Parents who get sick most often: on antidepressants or sleeping pills, in emotional burnout or depression, with alcohol … All these “little things” have now become almost harmless, they are so common. Smart parents who realize they’re being driven mad on a hamster wheel without even the sweetness of utopia. Parents are deeply disturbed to see the world go into a tailspin and that, trapped in this social contract, no one has a solution, be it pollution, energy, food, health. Parents got into amber.
Look at these kids.
If they are 11, like me, then they know Eastern geopolitics better than their multiplication table. They are allegedly worried because they are too protected by bicycle helmets. Not at all in terms of a world that is falling apart because we continue to sing musette on the Titanic, which is our Planet. Not because they get yelled at at the slightest piece of paper that falls on the floor, or at the slightest light bulb lit unnecessarily – when ordering things on Amazon or on vacation through Ryanair. Of course not. They are probably not endowed with reason, maybe they don’t even have souls – or halves, like the women of antiquity … Well, that’s it. Welcome to the 21st century, a replacement for an archaic world in which we have built an estrangement from our children because we have failed to provide them, most of them, with enough protection to bring them into adulthood.
In energy therapy, people are believed to be strong enough – in fact, they are threatened by the depth of their instinct for self-preservation – to save themselves, to heal all the evil accumulated by their family. If I have a deep conviction, it is that the generation that is growing up is there. She has this clarity that nothing is going well and this ability to dismiss everything, unleash beliefs, “should”, “this is so”, “I’m at your age” and other “you’ll see when you are”. Fourty years”.
She can, she wants to, build something else. However, she will only succeed if she can truly fulfill herself, be completely herself, and get out of the trodden paths that lead to beating her head against the walls. He will only succeed if he makes an alliance with today’s adults in the name of one thing: “let’s try to save you.” It is in this capacity that our children must be cherished and protected: they are the only ones who can think of the (new) social contract that we badly need. It is their vision of the world, their unwillingness to be exhausted into old age, their will to do otherwise, in full accordance, that will allow us to get off the Hamster wheel.
If we sacrifice them to maintain a social contract that no longer matters, we will end up losing both our children and our democracy. So please, the next time your child throws a tantrum, stop. Think back to the day he was born, when you thought he was the most precious being in your life. Take your courage with both hands: listen to it scream at you, watch it resonate in you, and dare to be part of those who face their fears and never sacrifice themselves again.
Open a path for your children: one that you would like it to open for you.